I am all about the cheese.  Seriously, folks, I love cheese.  I crave cheese like a junkie craves heroin.

Of all the things about my restricted diet that I hate, having to cut down on my cheese intake is the one that hurts the most.

Don’t even think about letting me near one of those cheese stores that sells all of the various types of cheese.  You know, those ones that have the little sample cartons next to each kind of cheese?  We’re talking Pamela heaven here.

Why?! Why in God’s name?!? I shout it to the heavens, does cheese have to be so high in calories and points?!?

It’s supposed to be good for you!  It’s got dairy in it and dairy is good for you!

I try to calm my cravings with Borden Fat Free Sharp Cheddar Cheese slices, since it’s the only fat free cheese I’ve found that actually has flavor.  If I’m making a pizza or something, I might break out the Kraft Free Mozzarella, but it’s just not the same.  It’s decent, but tends to seem a bit like plastic at times.

And it’s just not the same as a big hunk of sharp cheddar (love the sharp cheddar) cheese with crackers.  Yum!  I love cheese of all varieties, especially the ones with stronger flavors like sharp cheddar.  Hand Pam a plate with a chunk of sharp cheddar cheese, some crackers (which are also astonishingly high in points) and leave her be.  You won’t hear a peep out of her, except perhaps a moan of ecstasy from time to time. 

Sadly, those days have to all be behind her.  <sigh>  I was really craving some cheese last weekend and wanted some “real” cheese.  I must have stood in front of the cheese section of the grocery store for a good fifteen minutes trying to decide what I wanted.  And what I wanted, they didn’t have.  I want, long, dream of the day when they have a block of fat-free sharp cheddar cheese for sale at the grocery store.  I say it can be possible some day!  Even reduced fat sharp cheddar would be nice.

I couldn’t decide whether to be a good girl and get the regular reduced fat cheddar cheese, or just go for it and get the full-fat, sharp cheddar block.  I ended up being the good girl.  But it’s still 2 points for ONE ounce!  Do you know how small an ounce of cheese is? I mean, come on!  A mouse wouldn’t be satisfied!

So, I did what I do with all of my foods that have small portion sizes.  I cut it up into tiny little pieces to make it last longer.  I know.  I’m a freak.  I admit it.  Here’s a pic of my butchered one ounce of cheese.  Pretty pitiful, isn’t it?  Keep in mind that this is a very small plate, like a salad plate.

But, dammit, I love my cheese!

In fact, my love of cheese actually led me into buying a movie called “I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With,” starring Sarah Silverman.  My advice if you happen to see it at the store is to keep on walking….