I had a dream about my brother last night.

I love having dreams about him.  Sadly, it doesn’t happen very often.  It’s been just over five years since he died, and having a dream where I’m interacting with him makes me feel like I was given a chance to be with him again.

Last night’s dream was kind of odd, though.  I’ve always been fascinated by dreams, and their potential for meaning or relevance to our daily lives.  In fact, I considered specializing in dream and sleep research at one point (among the billions of other things I’ve considered at one point or another).

I’m pretty sure I know what last night’s dream meant.  Part of it anyway.  I dreamt that we were at a small ice cream shop.  We were getting ready to leave soon, but it was time for our dessert.  He ordered a large ice cream in a big glass (weird, I know) that we began to share.  We were then called by the employee that our to-go order was ready.  He had ordered two more to go.  As I was taking a bite I asked him why he had ordered two more when we were already eating one.  They put them in paper bags (?) for us to carry out and I went up to get them.  When I turned around, my brother had left and I dropped one of the bags on the floor.  Somehow I knew I was supposed to meet him at the car.  However, he had left all of his stuff there.  I scrambled to try to pick everything up:  the to-go bags, some other food, bags we had carried in, and our shoes (huh?).  One of the employees tried to help me, but I remember being aggravated because my brother had left without helping me.

Things get a little hazy here, but later on in the dream, I dreamt that my brother was going to have surgery and I was rushing trying to get to the hospital.  The hospital was in a downtown area of a city, but not the city we live in.

I think the part of the dream where he left me and I had to carry all of our stuff alone is pretty obvious.  I’ve often felt like he left me to deal with everything alone, my parents’ medical issues in particular.  The rest of it, I’m pretty baffled.  Any thoughts?