I know that my posts lately have been less than cheerful, and less than full of positive weight loss joy, and I apologize for that.  I’ve been a pretty miserable person over the past week, and it’s hard to spread sunshine in such a situation.

I’ve mentioned multiple times the fight that I’ve had with nausea due to the medication that my doctor put me on at my request.  I’ve tried not to mention what the one that was making me sick was, but now I figure what the hell.  My doctor actually started me on two medications.  One that I don’t really think I need and is just his “easy way out” of trying to figure out what is really going on with me.  The other is the birth control pill Yasmin.  Specifically, I’ve been taking the generic form, Ocella.  I did request to go on the pill (mainly for medical reasons), but the doctor chose this particular kind based on my circumstances and the fact that it is actually supposed to be one of the ones with the least amount of side effects.  Hmm.  Picture me here with one eyebrow raised.

I took the first medication for four days before starting the Ocella with no noticeable (or new) problems whatsoever except for a slight increase in fatigue.  From the day I started taking the Ocella, I was one miserably, wretchedly unhappy camper.  The first bout of nausea occurred about 6 hours after I started taking it and didn’t slow down until late last night.  That’s 8 straight days of full blown nausea (with vomiting one day), 24 hours a day.  It would actually wake me up every couple of hours at night, which, of course, reinforced the exhaustion.

Last night, I decided enough was enough and that I couldn’t take a single day more, so I didn’t take this morning’s pill.  I honestly felt like I had been poisoning myself.  And while I didn’t get much sleep last night (for other reasons), I feel about 80% better.  The nausea is almost completely gone.  We went out for lunch for my mom’s birthday and I actually made it through the entire meal without feeling like I was going to get sick.  I wish I could have stuck it out because the nausea is supposed to diminish.  It can take up to three months to go away, though, and as I said, I honestly couldn’t take one more day.

I’m a little disappointed that my experience with it didn’t go better.  I’d been extremely hopeful that it would be a good thing for me.  I’m also completely terrified to try any other brand since this was supposedly one of the milder forms.  ??? In the past couple of days, however, I’ve been doing a bit of research online and it doesn’t surprise me one bit that it made me sick.  I know that a lot of women take it without any problems, but the number of women out there who have had problems is insane.  There’s actually something called the Yasmin Survivor’s Forum!  I found another site of comments by women who have had problems with it and there were 92 - yes, that’s ninety-two - pages of comments/complaints/bad experiences.  Yikes! 

I will admit that the possible risks concern me, as well - the risk of blood clots (I do sit often), and the increased risk of breast cancer.  I knew of the risk of blood clots, but I wasn’t aware until I started taking this that there was that increased risk of breast cancer with the pill.  With my mom’s history of breast cancer, that definitely concerns me.  Hers wasn’t estrogen-fed, but I already have an increased risk due to her history.

I will also admit that all prescription drugs scare the crap out of me.  I often laugh at the drug commercials on TV with their long list of side effects and think to myself “oh please, let me take that!”  (Full of sarcasm, of course.)  Sometimes the side effects sound worse than whatever it is that it’s supposed to cure! 

So I’m a bit befuddled right now as to how to proceed.  The other medication he put me on is an anti-anxiety medication.  I’ve mentioned on here issues that I believe I’m having with my thyroid - my thyroid stimulating hormone level has been way off - and I have multiple symptoms of hypothyroidism.   A few of which are anxiety, foggy-headedness, etc.  When I went in to see my doctor, and I explained my symptoms, his first thought and the only one he seemed willing to consider is “it must be the anxiety.”  He totally discounted the other medical symptoms I was having. and said “the anxiety is causing all of this.”  I personally think that’s a load of bull, because over the past couple of years, my anxiety has actually decreased remarkedly.  In fact, while I do feel some work-related anxiety and anxiety over my parents health, the majority of my anxiety resides around how I’ve been feeling, the physical symptoms I’ve had, and my apparent inability to find a decent doctor.

I’ve done research and according to www.stopthethyroidmadness.com, a lot of doctors seem to like to take the easy way out and try and just blame it on anxiety or depression and prescribe a pill.  I’m not depressed.  In fact, I haven’t been this happy with my life situation in years.  Yes, I may feel a bit anxious lately, but I think he has things flipped around backwards.  He even admitted that anxiety can’t cause an elevated TSH (while an elevated TSH can cause anxiety), but he, like my other doctors, don’t seem to want to find out what is actually causing it.  It’s so hard to find a good doctor, and when you do, it’s even harder to get an appointment.  My mom loves this doctor, but I’ve been less than impressed.  He seems nice enough, but I don’t really feel like he listens to me (he’ll ask me the same question over and over). 

The side effects from this medication scare the bejesus out of me, too.  One of the fun ones is hunger.  Uh-huh.  Hunger.  ‘Cause isn’t that what every Weight Watcher with a history of compulsive eating wants more of??? I thought so!  So for the past week, while I’ve been fighting off nausea, I’ve also been fighting off ravenous hunger.  One second I’ll feel like I’m about to throw up and the next I am starving like someone who has been shipwrecked on a deserted isle for ten years.  Then I’ll start to make something to eat and the nausea will return.  Then the hunger, hence my current pathetic-ness.

Now that I have the nausea pretty much under control, my next step is to get a copy of my most recent bloodwork and see what my TSH level is.  I should get it in the next couple of days.  If it’s still crazy-high, I’m going to try and beg my way into an earlier appointment with my endocrinologist.  She schedules months in advance and my next appointment isn’t until February.  After I see her, or if I can’t get in to see her, then I’m going to call primary care physicians until I find one that I can get in to see and one that I like.

So that’s the update on me.  I promise the next post, coming shortly, will be much more cheery!